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Love, love.

Monday, June 28, 2010

Okay. BEAST WAS IN MALAYSIA, and i went to see them. Of course i did. (: I do consider myself a fan, i've been watching them since they debuted, stood up for them, watch them grow and fell in love even more.

This was my first experience of what i call a terrible crowd of fans. It was all crazy and ppl were just all screaming and shouting and pushing for god knows what reasons, with all the fake fainting and stuff, it really amused me. Maybe the kind of fandom they're in is just slightly different than mine. Mine's made out of love and only love.

Back to that day. 27th June @ KL Live Centre. Wrong choice of venue. Sighsss. The place was packed when we reached there about 5.30 ++ and we had to stand in line for 3 hours or so because i don't know what's up with all the fans or if they're actually tired or not, they refused to sit. There were 2 korean girls in front of me in the line and i swear i've seen them before. Up until now, i still don't know where. Chih. This is getting irrelevant.

After a lot of screaming and pushing and all that, we finally made our way into the hall at about 8.35 or so. Thats wayy too late but there's no point complaining. They were playing the videos and all that, thank God for the screen at the back. Loads of scary fanboys who cheered when they played 4 minute's MV. They host dude is really nice despite how the fans are definitely not.

BEAST finally came up. And for the life of me, i really don't remember which song the sang first or the sequence, but they sang a total of 6 songs and ended with a remixed version of Mystery and Bad Girl, they sound so so so good live.

After the U-Kiss experience, this was a lil different, they fans weren't all THAT happy and neither were BEAST. We're not allowed to pass them gifts personally, no touching and only a handful of them spoke to them. Lol. Let's start with members.

Junhyung : So much swagger. He is exactly like that in real life. No wonder he calls himself the joker. He has the same facial expression for the whole 3 hours or so and its just.. him. He's got really diamond shaped eyes, gorgeous forehead, really awesome hair and he's rap is like WOW. Sorry, bias showing a lil but he was always my first love. (: At the fansigning session, I was shaking going up on stage and because he was first i took all the courage i had and said '안녕하세요, 오빠' and silence. So i decided, i have to say something, and i continued '사랑해요' , in which where he looked up and i stared at his eyeliner+eyes and he nodded at me. ᄏᄏᄏᄏ

Dongwoon : Ahhh he's just like all smiley and all. Nicest to fans so far i think, he's just such a sweetheart. First, he's really tall. As if we don't know that. And he was just smiling at us genuinely, its so hard not to return it. Looking at him smile just makes me wanna melt and slurp my way into their suitcase and back to korea with them.

Kikwang : AWW he's so tiny seated next to Dongwoon who's easily half a head taller than him seated and he was all smiles and it was like all rainbowy and sunny looking at him. I managed to re-pull myself together and i said '사랑해요, 오빠' to him and he smiled again. Awwww, i wanna squish him and all that. OHH and he flashed his abs (twice) the night before but because i was so far behind i only managed to see like.. 2 packs instead of six. HAHA. So adorable.

Doojoon : OMG HE WAVED AT ME and i was like 갸야야아~ He waved at me 3 times when he looked at my sign and just smiled. I might have died and came back to live. At that moment, it was just SO worth it standing there being pushed ad pulled and all that just to know that he know i exist and i am his BIG fan. At least my face crossed his mind once? *hugesmile* He was making really really cute faces the whole night and i spent almost the whole time trying to look in between heads and arms trying to find him. He was all leader-ish, tried to interact with the fans from upstairs as well. How can i not fall for someone like him? Aww, i miss him already.

Hyunseung : He's all beautiful and porcelain skinned and doll-like and just so.. have i mentioned beautiful? I don't know what kind of mood he was on that night or even the next day cause he was just like.. that. He had time to like examine his fingers while autographing. Poor baby looked so pale and all sickly, or maybe that's just me but i wanted to cheer him up so i made my sister write me a sign on the spot and no offence, but it looked like crap at first. Who cares really? The point is, when they were getting up and ready to leave, they came to the front, stood in a line and waved at the crowd. I kept flapping my board at him and he finally saw it, i swear he finally broke into a tiny tiny smile and WAVED AT ME! I became completely incoherent at that moment. On the next day at 1U, the books kinda stopped moving for awhile so when it was my turn to stand in front of him, he looked up and stared at me, like seriously, we had some kind of staring competition or something it was so scary and all but isn't that what i went up stage to do anyway, stare at them? OMG his eyes were like piercing and scary but i couldn't look away, he finally broke it and looked down to sign. I will remember that face of his for the rest of my life. Up until now, if i close my eyes i can still see him staring at me. ᄒᄒᄒᄒ

Yoseob : He's like tiny and all, with his little smile and kinda small face, he was so adorable. And oh, i haven't mentioned that i went on stage holding a sign that says "Let's get married" in which where HE READ IT. He was the only one who really read my sign, he mouthed it out as he read it and then looked at me when he was done, i was practically shaking, then HE NODDED. TWICE! Bwahahaha, i went off stage thinking "Can we get married yet?" His face was like a mixture of shock, amusement and bored. Lol. Mostly surprised though, i was the only one with a sign that said such weird things. OMG at that time, waiting in line for 5 hours straight, being treated like prisoners and all that was SO WORTH IT.

In other words, despite being totally passive about it all and i didn't get to talk to them, didn't get to touch them, i sound like such a perv but it was a pretty great day. Concert? Definitely. 돌아와, 요, 오빠! ᅲ.ᅲ

Now let the pictures do the talking, there's not much, but yeah.. The pictures are all at random.


My Doojoon sign where HE WAVED AT ME and taking this picture, i was still pretty high that time, standing still was almost impossible.



Saying goodbye, waving at the crowd. Love love love the red suits. OHHH i think this was like moments before Hyunseung waved at me. Wheeeeee~



They just got out of their seats , moving to the front of the stage. Didn't i mentioned the pictures are all at random?


OHH. Moe. ᄏᄏᄏᄏ He had his hand on my back and he's so nice la AISHH. No Mike though, omg i really have to get over this stupid crush i have on him.



Uhhh. Before the autograph session began, we were on our way to wondering to the front of the place where miracles take place. (:


This was actually the first picture taken. LOL they came out in white and Hyunseung's shirt was so transparent under the light HAHA.

There's alot more to say, but.. it's okay. I will remember. 영원히..

I may a more bigger fan than i already am now, but i don't really dare to call myself a B2UTY yet because being a fan is more than just that. What i am now though is an avid supporter and i REALLY want them to do well and hopefully reach the top someday. At least i know watched them grow from the beginning and that i'll be here watching them reach the top.

비스트, hwaiting!


21st.

Monday, June 21, 2010



You are forever 막내 to the ELFs.
생일 축하해, 오빠!

사랑 해~

Starstruck.

Sunday, June 20, 2010

OMG i think i fell in love again, i'm sorry to say but this is going to be one whole fangirling post. I mean, after touching them (lol) its just not possible to not go crazy.

Okay. Breath. They're all just so beautiful in real life. Maybe this actually applies to ALL korean super stars. I didn't think i'd be this crazy when i walked into the hall but yeah. I was conveniently seated next to the PA system and i kinda well.. stared at the ajusshi-s sitting there doing their stuff and then suddenly this one guy with his walkie talkie said that U-KISS was coming, my heart stopped beating. And well.. a lot of screaming happened. I couldn't even wrap my head around the fact that they were indeed standing in front of me on stage being beautiful and all. They are definitely different kind of band, they were all so freakin happy and their endorphins radiated all throughout the hall and the next thing i knew, i was actually happy. Really happy. (:



In the beginning while the place was pretty much empty.

This was taken after they disappeared for a break before coming back out for the fan-signing.

Uhh. Thinking about it is making my hands all shaky again. So anyway, they played games and all with the girls who are currently the happiest fangirls alive or something dammit i want to be them. Oh well. Then they sang and all, they sound so good and Kevin's voice is even more adorable when you hear him live. I couldn't keep my eyes off Kisoep whom i fell in love with even more. Why am i typing all these nonsense? THE POINT IS. I TOUCHED THEM.

So the fan-signing started and they were all so freakin adorable although i'm pretty sure i mentioned that already, they were all teasing us with their heart signs and Soohyun who took off his performing outfit and which where Eli followed soon after EKJTIRUHGJRE so they sent the girls up and we just sat there and watched , it seemed like nobody else noticed but i DEFINITELY saw Kibum hug one girl, ish that lucky girl. I couldn't keep my eyes off Soohyun who was just being so absolutely adorable with his small actions and whispering i love you to the passing fangirls and pouting when noone heard him or when he stuck out his hand to hi5 them but they just walked pass him HOW COULD THEY?

Okay. By the time i stood in line to wait for my turn on stage, my legs were shaking, one hand sweating, one hand just really cold. The only thought i had in my head while on my way up was "Touch them touch them touch them." LOL. I didn't come all the way here to NOT touch them. I got my album from Eli. Let tell you how that few seconds passed although it felt like an eternity to me. I don't expect anyone to read this, its for my own memory's sake.

I walked up to him, looked at Xander first (even though he was second in line) then i stopped in front of Eli because the girl in front of me completely ignored him and passed her gift to Xander (even though we were apparently not allowed to). I looked at Eli, his eyes WOW okay reminds self to breath, no eye makeup btw. I reached out both my hands to him (idiot why didn't i say something?) and i swear he gave me a small smile before he gave it to me and i managed to stick my hand out at him in which where he looked at it for awhile before he shook it, it felt like forever but i think it was just a few miliseconds long or something. So they girl in front if me just got her album by the time i stopped gawking at Eli, while Xander passed out the album to the girl in front of me, i actually grabbed his hand before moving on (i'm not crazy, i just really really like him) he must've thought i was a freak or something, LOL.

I looked at Kisoep's hair, my brain did not function in time for me to find his face, totally blanked pass Kevin and Dongho (i'm so sorry and you don't know how much i regret it) and saw Kibum who apparently wasn't looking at me even though i stuck my hand out at him, chih. LOL. And then i was like 'SOOHYUN!' in my head, i didn't dare to look at him or something (slaps self) so i actually hit his hand before i looked up at him where he was smiling and all oh so beautiful i still remember how his hand felt on mine, it was kinda small for a guy's hand it was like.. warm. *faints* I would've screamed on stage if i could but i wobbled down the stairs trying really hard to walk but seriously, my legs were just shaking.

The guards then kicked us outta the hall. HMPH. We went out and tried to process everything that just happened. GAH. And when we finally got to thinking again, we have to go inside. There was a guard at the door actually but my sister said we were looking for something so he just let us in. So we went in and i continued watching them. They took a group photo and then left. I was just like NOOOOOO watching them disappear backstage.



OH right. Mike Campton was there and he was like totally cute in real life and REALLY tall, 191cm apparently and i think i have this mini mini crush on him but he was so cute okay shut up jill.


I managed to tell him that i watch his show every week in, which is quite true actually because there's always nothing else to watch. Have i mentioned that he's really cute? ^^

Oh wait. Seeing them at the fanmeeting was NOT the only thing that happened. Actually, the highlight of the day was my first ever fan account with them. OMG that was the best and stupidest moment of my life in which where i still wanna strangle myself and throw myself off the twin towers for being so absolutely stupid about it. GAH.

Okay. So we went to the hotel and waited awhile to see if they were coming back and that evil ajusshi actually told us that they won't be coming back until midnight in which where he obviously lied because I SAW THEM. We walked out the door to head back to KLCC actually, but at that moment, a few Serena-s came and stopped with their tinted windows and all, i knew something was up but i never would've believed that it was them. The manager came out of the first van and i was like 'i definitely recognize him' (he was in front of me quite alot actually) and then ELI stepped out of his van and i just.. stared. and stared. and stared. Until my brain came back to life, i called Jo over and then out came the rest of them.

OMG i think i really just died, i was so stunned that no voice came out even, i didn't manage to do anything but stare until Kevin waved at us saying hi with 2 hands, how much more adorable can he get ahhhh and well. Kibum walked pass and they all started moving, and that's where i suddenly regained my senses and shouted 'Enjoy your stay here!' I swear to you the sentence i had in my head was definitely longer and then Kibum decides to turn around and HE SMILED AT ME that beautiful blinding smile ahhhh *dies and comes back from the grave* Now that think about it, i vaguely remember Dongho turning and smiling too but i think i kinda stopped thinking already. && then, they were almost through the doors by then and Soohyun turned around for that one second and smirked/smiled at us with the security guard pushing him in and all, he's so sweet. That's when i concluded, i'm in love all over again.

Okay. So that was like the 2nd best day of my life (i'm sorry, i'm forever an ELF first) and I'll never never forget this. EVER.

I have a dream..

Friday, June 18, 2010

Went to Jo's house. (:

And spent about 2 hours cooking or rather attempting to and failing a lil when we realised that we needed sugar in the noodles AFTER we finished cooking it so we re-cooked it and poured one of Jo's many sugar packets into the noodles because its the only kind of sugar she has while re-cooking it and then re-served and ate it from the pot. LOL. Jo must've done the most dishes she today than forever. And in which where she was trying to cook the 김치찌개 and after she was almost done with it realising that she needed garlic in it and so she put garlic in it after it was almost done. After all the mess, and believe me, there was alot of mess, we managed to put together a pretty awesome and really spicy (for me) meal. (:


Don't bother reading all of that.




... to be an awesome wife.

A reason to live.

Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Went to Lost World yesterday. It took the life outta me.
Woke up 4 hours earlier than usual. Ate more than usual.
Stayed in the sun more than usual. And i'm a few shades darker again.
At least it was all almost free?

It was a new experience to just walk through the gate and act like nothing is wrong.
Because it wasn't. (:
I can get used to this.
I don't think it'll ever happen again though.
Life is not that easy, unfortunately.

And i wonder again,
when am i going to ever snap out of this?


A raccoon. Sighs.

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