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Aflame.

Monday, April 30, 2012

"You think the weather here is bad?
No, the weather is Hell is worse." 

Sunway CF Camp @ Golden Sands Baptist Assembly, Port Dickson.

It was a completely last minute decision to make, but I know that it is not a coincidence that I went. It was God's plan. I didn't know what was going on, where we were going, what we were gonna do, how, what.. why? I didn't doubt my decision, but I grumbled a little. Nevertheless, like any good camp, I'm glad I went, and I'm glad I'm back. And I hope I'm back changed.


Its been so long since i've been a camp, moreover a CF camp. The one word I kept hearing from God throughout the camp was encouragement. I know I was lost for awhile before the camp, and when the option to get closer to God came round, I couldn't say no.

"We don't survive on leftover grace."


I know God has been using people to speak to me, and I hear it. Going back to God is always easy because His arms are always open. But I also know that neglecting God's much more easier. Everyday will be a challenge, and I can only pray I persevere.

"If God has forgiven you, for goodness' sake,
forgive yourself."

After the encouragement came the teaching. There are ways I have to change, I don't know, how to be that people may see Christ in me. It bothers me when people find out that I'm a Christian and go "Really? I never knew." Its as if I've been showing them otherwise. But, why? What am I doing wrong? 

"For what will it profit a man if he gains everything and loses his soul?" 
- Mark 8:36

 The people: 


My group for the camp, Blazing Beta.


with Victor, group mate. 



with Gideon, who does not have Facebook. 


with the girls, on Banquet Night. Which is this activity that the camp had for us. Each guy picked out a name of a girl and uhhmm,. went for dinner together? It was.. awkward. The one I went with, Kevin, was 18, doing A levels, and really quiet. I did like 70% of the talking and just tried to make it less awkward. It was.. fun


Then we had a campfire, where there were roasted marshmallows and oreo, some good live music, African praise song, failed choir, great company. 


Obligatory sister picture. (:
We had some fun not telling people that we were sisters, nobody really figured out until the end, and even then they didn't want to believe us. Haha.

"I have fought a good fight.
I have finished the race."

Thank you, God. Life is hard, but God is good.



A thousand times I failed,
still Your mercy remains.


Proportionate.

Wednesday, April 25, 2012






그냥 있으면 돼.
내 옆의.




한달.

Sunday, April 15, 2012


11th April. Its been a month. 
It honestly feels like its been longer. I have no idea what that's supposed to mean. Sometimes I wish time would just fast forward to a year later or something so I don't have to actually go through it. Thats a sad thought, but I really cannot find the confidence to believe I'd make it through all that. Oh god, whats with all the negative thoughts. 

Anyway, its all been good. Its been one of the best months of my life. I don't dare to think further. Lets just say, lets try to make it to two months. (: 

Its so freaky, I've never really celebrated these things. Well. We ate some really nice pasta that day. I actually don't think we have any picture together other than some uhh.. red-faced ones. Haha. The thought of that makes me kinda sad now. =\ 

That funny essay thing he wrote for me. ᄏᄏᄏᄏᄏ It is exactly what I just described it as: funny. I would say its really nice and sincere and.. funny. ᄒᄒᄒ

이런 걸 여자는 해는데. 내 남자 친구가 로맨틱이네. 
미안해, 감사해, 사랑해.

Never back down.

Sunday, April 8, 2012

남자는 웃긴다. 
너무 감동적인.
여자보다 더. 
._.

귀엽다 생각했지만. 
힘들어죠. 
다치기 면요?
그럼 어떻게?
아이구.  

Maybe I've settled into comfort too soon. I think most people take years to get to my phase now. Why do I always feel everything so fleetingly (and) fast? I just.. believe. I'm okay being on my own. 쉽게 잃어버린 않을겟지. Is it wrong for me to believe so? Hmmmm.  
Maybe I'm holding on too lightly?


And because its been such a lazy Saturday, this is all I accomplished. 
(:

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