Involuntary solitude.

Friday, August 1, 2014

For a moment in time, a few weeks ago, it was easy to write down my irrelevant thoughts. But now, its hard enough to construct a proper sentence to just explain what I'm feeling or thinking. My brain capacity seem to have died with whatever that was remainder of my social life, haha. 

So, it feels like so much have been going on, but actually I haven't been doing much. Just being consumed by my own thoughts and overflowing emotional stress. Firstly, uhm. I don't even know how to begin. Coming back from Singapore... oh wait. I haven't even blogged about Singapore. 

Okay, fine. Quick one. Singapore to me was a quick vacation, a small runaway, a little escape, a form of healing. Because it seems, I had such a hard time trying to find peace within myself, within the four walls of my room.

Also, family trip! And I have been wanting to visit Universal Studios for like ever. 

 And to Far, Far Away. It was a good trip, generally. With a lot of walking, so much walking. And in a new place too, so that was a lot of fun to me; to be able to see another side of Singapore that I would technically have no reason to go to on my own anyway. We stayed at Clarke Quay, and there's alot of tourists there. Also managed to bump into a very old friend, oh the irony of the world. 

 Genuine smiles. 

Trying to shut out my own mind for awhile, while letting it run freely on its own. Everywhere I went there were reminders of a brief bittersweet memory, and just reminders of my current situation. In other words, there's nowhere to run wan la. Just face it head on.

 I know what people would say like I'm too skinny or whatever, but I really liked how my legs look in this whole trip. HAHA. Sorry, a little vanity slipped through my fingers. Visiting the nature, seeing it all again in daylight, good times. In the end of everyday was just tired feet. 

Also, one of the reasons for planning this trip at such a timing was to attend Becky's wedding. Ahh, how we've grown up, grown old. I remember the time when I meet her in her teens, and here I am now, officially an adult and attending her wedding. Nostalgic. 

 Heh, I was a little too tall, awkwardly bending. Ahh, so much beauty in seeing people choose their life partners and love. And that leads me to think about the future, marriage and all. Hmmm. I think this trip was a fulfilling one, all the past, present and future. Or, I'm just trying to sound positive. Forever is a long time, you know. 

The long lines and all the time spent waiting, I wish the rides were more... exciting. Lol. And also, we managed to get mummy go to on most of the rides with us. She bailed on the mini-rollercoaster which was.. pretty thrilling. Haha, I came down acknowledging that I am now older and not so "on" as last time. Finding food was always the problem I think. Where's the food at? That's one thing I will never learn about Singapore.

This trip was actually laced with a lot of hurt, but its what makes it so special to me. Now I'm back and still I have no idea what's in store for me, but like I said just now, have to face wan la. The semester has started and still things were going rough for me. I'll keep that for the next post.

“Don’t let what he wants eclipse what you need. He’s very dreamy, but he’s not the sun. You are.” -- Sandra Oh, Grey’s Anatomy

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